What do you do?

I knew it would happen sooner or later. I have experienced loss as a teacher before. As I have mentioned before, we lost a student a few years ago and it was extremely traumatic. I didn't have that student in MY class. I grieved then, but it wasn't like this.  I had another little girl die several years ago. She had cancer and we knew it was coming. That doesn't make it any easier, really. This one ripped my heart out. THIS one was a student I had a few times. He graduated a couple of years ago. He was trying to do something with his life. He was working, taking classes, and had just joined the military. (Just in case my online friends are wondering, this is not the student I so frequently referred to as kiddo. This one graduated a couple of years before that group)

I first saw a story online about the accident. It just said, 'Mississippi Man Killed in Wreck on Springhill Ave.' I clicked on it. I promise, I didn't even read the story. His name just stood out to me. It was like his name was in 65 pt font. He has an unusual name, so I knew it was him. It was just an accident.

I had JUST heard from him the Friday before. He sent a message through another teacher to say hello, that he missed us, and that he was doing well.

My heart hurt. It hurt for me, the other teachers, his friends, his sister, his mom, his girlfriend, and for everyone who didnt get the chance to know him.  I questioned, 'Why would God take a kid who was trying to do something with his life??' I still wonder. I don't know the answers.  I know God is in control. He HAS comforted me. I talked with his mom last night at the service last night. She has been comforted by God as well, although she is hurting deeply.

When I first found out, I thought, 'Well, it would just be easier to not open my heart to the students I teach. It's just too hard to lose them.' I didn't think about that too long because that just isn't me. I have cried often. My heart has felt crushed. I had even felt like I was going to suffocate at times.

The service had to be delayed so long because his sister was in the car with him, and she was injured. They needed to let her heal. When she limped in last night with a cast on her arm and another one her leg, I burst into tears.  His family welcomed me last night. His mom hugged me. I shared stories about him in class. He ALWAYS kept everyone laughing. He was a treasure to have in class. It was an honor to teach him. I wish everyone had gotten the chance to know him. I wish he had gotten the chance to grow up.  I don't know why, but I know God does. Please continue to pray for his family. It has gotten easier as the days have gone by. I think I will always think about him at student assemblies (he was a great hip-hop dancer and once danced at a talent show. it was quite a memorable performance) and during basketball season. I won't forget him, but it has gotten easier. I love my job. I love the kids I teach. It's hard when things end this way, but I wouldn't trade having known him for anything.

More of this and that

So, I told a friend I had some favorite football players that didn't go to Auburn or Southern Miss. I was telling him using twitter with my cellphone, so I couldn't really list any players, so here they are in no particular order. I'm going to add a little story for some of them, but for some of them, there isn't really a reason.  I don't think it makes me any LESS of an Auburn fan because I appreciate some players from other schools. Nor does it make me any less of a Southern Miss fan. I love both of my schools but I also love football. Sometimes, I love these guys for off the field reasons, but these are players I admire, nonetheless.

1.  Peyton Manning
2. Dexter McCluster- he's just fast and fun to watch run
3. Tim Tebow- I don't think anyone tried harder to put God first in anything he did. You can disagree with me, and that is fine. I am not going to argue about it. I admire him.
4. Steve McNair
5. Walter Payton
6. Jay Barker
7. Colt McCoy- Did you know? He jumped out of a boat once when he was fishing because he saw someone struggling in the water. He swam across the lake and dragged him out of the water and rescued him from drowning.
8. Deion Sanders- Read his biography and your opinion of him won't be the same.
9. Herschel Walker
10. Rodney Scott- He listened when God spoke.
11. Larry Fitzgerald- I like to watch him catch and run. Even when he was in college.
12. Danny Wuerffel
13. Charlie Ward

I am sure there are some more, but these are the ones I can remember.

Now if I picked Auburn and Southern Miss players that were my favorite, we'd be here all day. :)